I don't have much to say this morning, except to say how grateful I am that 4am came and little Koby was crying in bed. He was crying because his tummy was empty and he wanted to let us know that he was ready for some food.
Just after midnight he had finished his late night feeding and decided to projectile vomit his entire meal up. He then slowly began to choke. A few minutes went by, and we noticed that his rosy colored skin was turning ghost white. Something wasn't quite right. Sharalee held him and stuck the bulb syringe down his throat to help clear his passageway. After a few more minutes his pale skin returned to a normal color, and he dozed off for a few hours of rest.
I wanted to share my gratitude that 4am came and I could hear his cry, waking me up and informing me it was time for the two of us to spend an hour or so together. I was able to hold him and feed him. And right now I am able to hold him in my arms while he sleeps peacefully again for a few more hours.
At about 7am this morning, give or take, Koby will begin his cry and let us know it is time for him to have more food. In all honesty sometimes the early morning cries aren't as welcoming or as exciting to hear, especially when the cries have caused us restless sleep. Because he was choking a few hours ago we had another restless night of very little sleep. But I welcome my chance and opportunity of having minimal sleep today because it means that I can hold this boy in my arms and hear his heart beating. It's so quiet in the house at (now) 5am. The only two things I can hear is the buzz of the fridge, and Koby's quiet breath.
I say all of this to just explain how grateful I am that our Koby is still alive. His body and his mind are not yet quite in sync with each other. We hope they will become in sync. But if they don't I will always be grateful for my chance to wake up in the middle of the night and just have a chance to hold him. To hear him breath. To serve him. To love him. What a wonderful honor it is to be a dad of a special needs child. This morning I feel as if I am the luckiest person in the world.
On another quick note Koby made it to church for the first time, and we were able to bring him with us to the zoo. Feeding him on the go isn't easy, but we are figuring things out.
2 comments:
You never cease to amaze me. The perspective you and your family have is exactly as it should be. Know that you are in our prayers always. Koby picked the perfect family to join. Sending lots of love.
What a miracle boy. You all amaze me and I just can't help by love Koby. Maybe it's all the love that surrounds him and maybe it's just the special spirit you know he is. We continue to keep you all in our prayers
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